if you have done your best to protect your kids from abuse and one day find you have failed:

do listen carefully to your children

spend a lot of time listening

listen kindly and objectively (even if you are justifiably shocked and horrified by their stories, try to be calm while you gather information, emote later)

try to talk about their experiences while playing a simple card game, walking, or engaging in some other relationship building experience

if you do want to talk about the abuse directly, limit your time of enquiry to no more than 3 minutes

if you think your child has been abused, understand the abuser has deceived you and your child, may have threatened your child, and that your child may feel confusion, shame, and guilt about the abuse

unconditionally support your child

report abuse

get a good counselor

shield your child from the abuser

do not expect your child to live with or have any contact with the abuser

shield your child from people who are not supportive

DO NOT BE AFRAID TO TELL THE TRUTH

this is just the beginning