How to want…to be His friend

You have to see past the blood—your own and his

The stinging sweat and the jeering crowds

The voice in your own pounding brain

Nay, voices—

Saying that no king of anything could die like this

Alone and vulnerable in the dumpster fire of all

You have to focus on his eyes

What he sees and what is reflected in them

Love beyond measure/sky without end

And you must listen to his voice

Agony is too small a word for what he has done for us

The fire of the wrath of a holy God

Substitutionary Everything

Nothing left without Him.

The Parables

Jesus knows that his beloved followers will need things to hold onto as they undergo the crushing persecution and ostracism of the first years (300ish) of Christianity.

So he gives them stories—stories so vivid and memorable and simple and beautiful that they can go back again and again to these stories to nourish them in the dark places they will find themselves in as followers of The Way.

The parable are rooms we can live in, stories we can inhabit, people and places and symbols we can return to again and again

As we wait in dark places

For the Return of the King.

The Keeper of Time

Why must I know what day it is in order to prove that I am cognizant?

Time is a shape shifting chameleon

Once a sundial or a watch of the night

Now it monitors the heart

Attempts to forecast the rain

And makes us feel the limits of the box we cannot bust out of on our own

Meanwhile

Eternity, the Infinite

Has already won.

You tell yourself

You tell yourself it will do no good

To acknowledge the child who floated in the beads of the ultrasound or the mantras of the obstetrical attending—

It is for her best not to know

Or the terrible error in calculating

The time it takes to unpack and repack a Pilot

A truck, an Accord, a house, a life

You tell yourself

It would have happened by now

The Icarus Moment

The violent fall

When an ordinary man walks into light eternal

Only to become it

We will all be changed

Some moments last for all

Eternity

Doppelgänger

Sarah? He asks on the street by the Rucker library

I look bewildered. No, not Sarah

You look so much like her!

Dark? Pretty? Young?

We never met

But recently it has been happening again—over and over

So many times

In Spanish and in other tongues—

Fatima? Esperanza? Rachel?

Who are they now?

Grey! Rumpled! Doughy!

We are a sisterhood across decades and barricades

The Sarahs by the library of now

Beauty behind, light ahead

Till the end of the age (holech)

Isaiah 35:7-8 KJV
[7] And the parched ground shall become a pool, and the thirsty land springs of water: in the habitation of dragons, where each lay, shall be grass with reeds and rushes. [8] And an highway shall be there, and a way, and it shall be called The way of holiness; the unclean shall not pass over it; but it shall be for those: the wayfaring men, though fools, shall not err therein.

Like many Christians all over the world, I long to see Jesus face to face.

He is my best friend, Rescuer, and Pearl of great price. And, let’s face it—this world can feel like a sinking ship. Sometimes it can be hard to wait.

The Bible encourages people who love Jesus to long for and look for his return, so I think I am supposed to be searching the sky and praying and hoping He will come back today, as-soon-as-possible!

And yet, I need to be trying to tell people about Him. He has been such a good friend to me, I want everyone to know him. I cannot imagine the loneliness and horror of my life without him.

This morning I had a dream with a field in it. The field was full of grass or wildflowers referred to in the dream as “holech.” I don’t speak Hebrew, so I looked the word up phonetically. Holech in Hebrew means

If you are walking in Jesus, keep walking and bring your friends with you. We are all called to lead people to Him.

And if you don’t know Him yet? He is our Rescuer, the Ransom for our shame, and “the friend who sticks closer than a brother.“

Don’t take my word for it, just ask Him. Tell him your doubts. Ask Him to answer all your hardest questions. He has. He will. He always does. Listen for His voice. He speaks the language of each person’s heart better than we do ourselves. (See idiolect https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/idiolect)

Matthew 13:37-43 KJV
[37] He answered and said unto them, He that soweth the good seed is the Son of man; [38] The field is the world; the good seed are the children of the kingdom; but the tares are the children of the wicked one ; [39] The enemy that sowed them is the devil; the harvest is the end of the world; and the reapers are the angels. [40] As therefore the tares are gathered and burned in the fire; so shall it be in the end of this world. [41] The Son of man shall send forth his angels, and they shall gather out of his kingdom all things that offend, and them which do iniquity; [42] And shall cast them into a furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. [43] Then shall the righteous shine forth as the sun in the kingdom of their Father. Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

Luke 21:25-28 KJV
[25] And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars; and upon the earth distress of nations, with perplexity; the sea and the waves roaring; [26] Men’s hearts failing them for fear, and for looking after those things which are coming on the earth: for the powers of heaven shall be shaken. [27] And then shall they see the Son of man coming in a cloud with power and great glory. [28] And when these things begin to come to pass, then look up, and lift up your heads; for your redemption draweth nigh.

Romans 10:9,11-13 KJV
[9] That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. [11] For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. [12] For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him. [13] For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.