The borrowed child

I once borrowed
A child/you could say
She was lent to me
her mother was a drug addict…I believed in the system…believed a caseworker…needed infinite

This is not a poem.

She held the world in her eyes
And all the treasure I could have
Begged, borrowed, stolen
I would have traded for her

My in-between child

The little boy whose mother is a chalk angel
Lying beneath
The chaos of war

The little girl who believes the old man in the white car
Who does not really ever
Need her help to find a puppy

The baby glued to a wall
Broken like a vase on the hard stones
Another woman
Laid down on the floor

she would have been a good mother…

It is the thing we call
A person who could do that to a child

My baby

He pulls the crystal bowl
Out as I am turned askew

His father viewed this as s trinket
And did not hide it away
High where it could not be reached

Shatters in an instant
And we both
Stand amidst the shards

I say
It is not fair

And scoop him into arms
His siblings distract him from the wreckage

And I sweep up the mess.
Put poultices on the ground

Pretending for a moment
That there is a magic word
For love
Stronger than

I would reach you
With my arms if I could
With my words if I must
Like walking on water
If I have to…

Resort to prayer.

Rebecca and her sisters

Sometimes I should keep my mouth shut and I don’t.
Sometimes I need to open it wider.
I have a vision in my head
Of all the scenes I haven’t made
Brought to me in part
By the ones I could not avoid.

You wanna say
grow up!
Get a life!
Get a job!
An education!

But most of all
You wanna say
watch out!
There are dangerous curves ahead!

You are young and stupid and don’t know what you have effing got yourself into
And an endless stream of
You gotta listen
’cause that kid you are gonna have
Deserves the life you wanted
As well as the one you threw away.

Rain Song

There was the statue
Of a girl
Standing arms outstretched
Poised/face lifted
To reach the rain
Receiving Grace

I looked for her again
Years ago
They had taken her away
I am crying/she is missing
And all I can do is call to her

Come back
My heartbreaking daughter
Come back to the Garden
Of stones alive and flowers
Blooming now
The rain has come